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Here Lies the Snow Leopard...
...curled, covered, camoflauged in the deep snow of the Himalayas; wrapped in her tail is an old weathered book - faded and cracked leather binding, pages flimsy with age peeking out from the cover.
"I came for the book" you say.
The Snow Leopard scoffs, breath misting the frozen air in an irritated huff. "So you have," she sighs.
She unfurls her thick protective tail, slowly, as if the action pains her; and in a way it does - to reveal this tightly kept secret to you.
You bow to her gratefully - you've ached to uncover the book for so long now...
You pick it up gingerly, as if cradling a limp sleeping baby. Finally! The mystery is right in your own hands.
Tenderly, you lift the worn cover and read...
falling
it is so lonely here.
its quiet on the outside, around me
but buzzing with anguished shouts
i n s i d e me
there are thoughts - depressed, hopeless, confused
- persisting.
i try to reason with myself,
"wake up honey"
but their weight crushes me.
what can i do?
send silent cries with the looks i give
fold more into myself - hide
shrivel under the gazes of others
avoid the mirror at all costs
...B r e a k
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1 comment:
Hey there, I wanted to thank you for the comments you have left me on my blog, and the contents of your own as well. I sense your sincerity and it really means alot to me :). What you are experiencing is good to read and your posts to me bear a familiarity. I remember myself a year ago depressed, feeling twisted, sometimes when those things surfaced everything would immanent a horrible darkness. I felt totally powerless and confused, very much painfull. It went on for awhile untill slowly slowly I began able to face myself agian, throw up those feelings. I think what it took was that subtle awareness that I recognize in your blooming piece. I remember regaining the recognition of life and when I read that I could not help but smile because of the innocence hehe. Anyways Im not saying that I live in a state of perfect happiness and confidence, but can say that I embrace death in myself and enjoy the recognition of all the faucets, feelings etc etc. I want to say that I am deeply respectful to you and recognize your strength, even if you feel yourself weak, imperfect. You have a kind heart and that is very beautiful to me.
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